Thursday, July 17, 2008

Heart Strings - What I learned from Doris

I lost a good friend and former co-worker a couple of weeks ago to a rare disease. She had been sick for six years and finally passed over to where I know she is jumping and dancing! I worked with her for 14 years before she got sick. She loved her job and was THE most generous person I ever knew. Its been on my heart to share what I learned from Doris.

Most of you have heard of the book from a few years ago called "Everything I need to know in life I learned in Kindergarten". Well, most of what I needed to know in life I learned from Doris. These are some of the them:

1. COVER FOR EACH OTHER: At work this went a long way toward creating a more pleasant working atmosphere. At the time we had six ladies working together and you know how that can be! Covering for each other meant no backstabbing. It meant when someone made a mistake, you didn't run tell, but helped fix it. It meant when someone had to run an errand, you covered for them. Then they in turn would do the same for you.

This is a very good Christian like attitude don't you think? Do we cover for each other in our day to day life? examples: Your husband or teenager accidentally locks himself out of his vehicle 25 miles away. Do you rant and rave and complain or very sweetly go as fast as you can to their aid. Don't you know that sooner or later you'll do the same thing? LOL. You see that your daughter desperately needs a day to run errands. Do you offer to babysit, go help or offer some spending money if she needs it? What ways can you "cover for each other" today?

2. DON'T EMBARRASS THE FIRM: This meant that we should be careful of how we acted and dressed away from work. If we were seen at the grocery store wearing sloppy clothes and someone saw us there, it would reflect on our work place. Same thing with how we behaved. I always remember this when I go somewhere, even to this day. You won't see me at the grocery store in short shorts!!!

This can be applied to our life in other ways besides work. Do we embarrass our Lord or families by the way we dress or act. I suppose this is where dressing modestly and acting sweet comes in. I've never been an immodest dresser, but I always need to be careful to be sweet. Like any good Southern girl, bless my heart. LOL I don't want anyone to see me doing anything that would be a bad reflection on being a Christian. I forget which Saint said, "Use words if necessary". We don't have to say a word sometimes to be a good witness for Christ.

3. DON'T TALK OUT OF SCHOOL: This meant that we should never tell ANYTHING outside of the office that went on there. Everything in my office is completely confidential.

At work and away from work, do we carry stories and gossip where it doesn't need to go? Are we loyal to our loved ones and family? You will never hear me put my family or spouse down to other people. If I can't lift them up, I keep quiet.

4. YOU CAN'T OUTGIVE THE LORD: Doris was the most generous person I ever knew. She would give you anything she had and was overly generous with it and there were no stings attached. I once saw her give a single mom we worked with her gas credit card because she knew she had to go somewhere and didn't have the money to buy gas. She gave to others even when she was too sick to even leave the house. Even after her death there are gifts waiting to be given to their new owners, both material and spiritual.

Are we generous enough? I hope to always give with "no strings attached". If I give something to my children, I don't expect them to pay me back later. Giving in secret is so much fun too! No recognition now, but in God's own time it'll be rewarded!

By the way, Doris's nickname for me was "Debbie Cakes". How sweet it that? I hope to live up to what she taught me. I never could have made it without her.


Anonymous said...

Debbie, I am so sorry to hear about your friend Doris. She sounds like she was such a special lady. Sending you hugs.

Anonymous said...

What an absolutely beautiful tribute to Doris. Would that each of us adopted her attitude. But, it is also a beautiful tribute to Debbie Cakes! Your affirmation of your feelings about family, co-workers and self as well as your behavior in public and private is priceless. But, knowing you, I know that it is true. mjw

Terri said...

I'm sorry about your friend, Debbie but what a wonderful person she was. Thank you for sharing those lessons with us.


ancient one said...

Great Post!! I need to check myself on some of the things Doris taught you! Wonderful Tribute!

Melinda said...

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your friend.

She sounds like a very special person. Your tribute was wonderful! I cried while reading it, it was so touching!

Pen Pen said...

Doris sounds like a very special lady... one who has touched your life forever. We need more like Doris in the world, and I dare say that you are one of them! Blessings to you, Debbie Cakes. Thanks for a very sweet post!

Alexandra said...

What a beautiful post! God bless Doris for passing along such a beautiful legacy, and touching so many lives. What a blessing to know someone like that. Prays for the repose of this lovely and kind soul.

Anonymous said...

Hi Debbie,
I am so sorry to hear about your friend. Great advise.

BLUE SKY said...

Mama, I love your new blog design. I'm sorry about Mrs. Doris. I remember her and she was very generous. I still remember babysitting for her once...? I think so anyway. I love you.

Alexandra said...

Debbie, you have won the Iris giveaway! Please email me at: alexandra3468 at gmail dot com so that I can get these lovely Iris bulbs off to you. :)

Dianne said...

Beautiful sentiments for a loving friend. You do her proud, Debbie! I know that you have thrilled her heart that you have learned a lot from this friend of yours.

It would be wonderful is someone could say that about us when we pass from this world!

The points that you have made are well worth taken and we would all be better people if we put them into place in our lives.

I'm sorry for your loss of such a wonderful friend!

Blessings & Hugs,

Kim ~ "HomeIsWhereTheHeartIs" said...

I enjoyed this loving tribute to your friend! She certainly has touched many people...we all should learn from her example.

Thank you for stopping by and for your sweet comment on my night stand makeover. The fabric box under the night stand is from Target, but I'm sure you could make something like it.

God bless,

Cyndy said...

Hi! I've been reading through your blog and am absolutely enjoying it! These are such good and important lessons to learn, would that we all learn them sooner than later. Thank you for sharing them! They have been a blessing.

Cyndy said...

Oh...and middle name is Doris and my grandmother's name was's kind of like this was a note from my Grandma :)

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